Tag Archives: confidence

How The ‘Rejection Trap’ Affects Your Life

Everyone fears rejection.  We each find our own way of coping with these or similar situations:

  • If you grew up with or are married to a critical authority figure
  • If you were bullied or made fun of in school
  • If you avoid relationships because you were dumped
  • If your supervisor or coworkers demean you

Rejection hurts deeply.  It’s understandable that you will do just about anything to avoid it. But…

  • Imagine feeling empowered even though someone is criticizing you.
  • Imagine not having to react to others’ careless remarks
  • Imagine responding calmly to button-pushers
  • Imagine avoiding taking the bait in the first place

The next time someone says something potentially hurtful to you, here are 5 strategies, outlined by Marisa Peer, best-selling author and motivational speaker, to AVOID the rejection trap:

  1. “Thank you for sharing.  Your opinion is noted.” Calmly deliver this powerful response non-defensively.  You will find that this dissipates the tension.
  2. “I’m sorry, could you repeat that please”  This unlikely response gives them pause to reflect upon their words.  90% of the time they will think about and retract what they said.  Again, don’t take it in. Stay calm.
  3. “Are you trying to be hurtful?”  Again, your non-defensive demeanor will give them pause to reflect and clarify their intention behind their words.
  4. Calmly and simply state, “I’m not going to let that in.”
  5. Evenly reply, “Did you know that critical people don’t like themselves. They are outwardly projecting their own personal dissatisfaction.  When they do this, they are showing everyone that they are their own worse critic.”  This confident delivery empowers you.

Visualize the insults coming at you like a tennis match.  Hit the ball back quickly with skill and confidence before it touches your body.  These techniques only work if you stay non-defensive.   Don’t take the insult in.  If you discipline yourself to respond vs react, you will find the strategies highly effective.

Have fun practicing this new challenge.  Along with being happier and less stressed, it may even save your life, your marriage or your job.  Worth the work?  Definitely.  Try it and see for yourself…

How To Avoid Rejection. Click Here

EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is a gentle and effective system of clearing self-sabotage and limiting beliefs from your energy system—this frees you to  create a life you love!
Schedule a complimentary discovery call now, email Laurel Brookes at:  laurelb.EFT@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • If you grew up with a critical authority figure
  • If you were bullied or made fun of in school
  • If you avoid relationships because you were dumped
  • If your supervisor or coworkers demean you

 

If you find yourself avoiding connection with others as a means of self-protection, that’s a pretty good indication that you have probably internalized other people’s rejection of you.  Rejection hurts deeply.  It’s understandable that you will do anything to avoid it.

 

The good news is that there are ways to avoid taking in rejection in the first place.

 

The next time someone says something potentially hurtful to you, here are 5 strategies to AVOID internalizing the rejection:

 

  1. “Thank you for sharing.  Your opinion is noted.”

Calmly deliver this powerful response non-defensively.  You will find that this dissipates the tension.

 

  1. “I’m sorry, could you repeat that please”  This unlikely response gives them pause to reflect upon their words.  90% of the time they will think about and retract what they said.  Again, don’t take it in. Stay calm.

 

  1. “Are you trying to be hurtful?”  Again, your non-defensive demeanor will give them pause to reflect and clarify their intention behind their words.

 

  1. Calmly and simply state, “I’m not going to let that in.”

 

  1. Evenly reply, “Did you know that critical people don’t like themselves. They are outwardly projecting their own personal dissatisfaction.  When they do this, they are showing everyone that they are their own worse critic.”  This confident delivery empowers you.

 

You might visualize the insults coming at you as a tennis match.  Hit the ball back quickly with  skill and confidence.  These  techniques only work if you stay non-defensive.   Don’t take the bait.  If you discipline yourself to respond vs react, you will find the strategies are highly effective.

 

Have fun practicing this new challenge.  Along with being happier and less stressed, it may even save your life, your marriage or your job.